Our Anniversary

Day Sixty-three – Thursday

On the Cancer front, no word yet whether TriCare will allow me to have the double Mastectomy.

On the health front, I have a cold with a sore throat and a runny nose and a cough.

Today is an anniversary for us. Forty years ago, I was an 18 year old girl who was searching for something to do with her life. After graduating from high school, my first love committed suicide and the boy I was dating (who swore I was his true love) decided to dump me. I lost my job and hadn’t taken any of the tests required to enter college. I was sleeping on a cot at my parent’s house and trying to find a job.

For some reason, I decided to go to a friend’s house. We were working on my car and talking. He mentioned that he needed a car to attend the Rodeo dance and I said he could use my car if he got me a date to the Rodeo dance. Quicker than you can say Rodeo dance, he was on the phone with his friend. As I sat and listened to the conversation, phrases like “Yeah, she’s a fox.” and “Come on over.” were uttered. I was mortified. I was wearing no make-up, my hair was in pigtails, and I had on a tube top and a pair of tight jeans. I couldn’t meet a new guy dressed like this. What was he thinking? But before I could object out loud and not just in my head, the deal was done. He was on his way over. Damn.

The first thing I remember about him was his big, black, Stetson and that he was so young. I, for some unknown reason, prefer younger guys, but two of them had just broken my heart and I was definitely not in the mood to have it happen again. But, I sat and talked to him. He was shy. He didn’t stay long – left with some excuse I can’t remember. And when he didn’t call me, I knew he wasn’t interested.

But, I am a persistent sort, so 2 or 3 days later I called him. He said it was his understanding that we wouldn’t have our first date until the Rodeo dance. I told him I wanted to see him before that to see if I wanted to go with him. He asked me if I was free now. I said “sure”.

We went to the drive-in in his Rambler American. About half way into the movie, I slid into the space next to him. He put his arm around my shoulder and we both turned to face each other. That first kiss…magic. I was home. I was right where I belonged.

Randy and I are opposites – he’s conservative, I’m liberal – he likes camping, I think roughing it means no room service – he likes hunting animals, I like hunting for bargains – he is a full blood German, my roots are all over the place – our blood types are even the exact opposite (A+ and B-). If we put our profiles up on any computer dating website, we would not be paired together. But the boy with the black Stetson has turned into the man who stepped up when I told him I was pregnant. He sat by my hospital bed for a week after I totaled his car. He watched as I threw a temper tantrum when we had to put our daughter in the hospital when she was 6 months old and held me when I finally started crying. He lets me take the lead, but is right there to pick up the pieces. He is my rock.

When I had Cancer the first time, he was at every doctor’s appointment, every surgery, every chemo injection, every group meeting and he was there when they told me I was Cancer free. He was there when I found out I had Endometrial Cancer and took care of me after my surgery. And he is with me this time.

We have our moments and I have threatened to leave and he has threatened to leave. But you can’t break up a love like ours. Through all the ups and downs, all the traumas, all the tears, all the joy – we’ve been there for each other. I honestly can’t imagine my life without him.

I’m grateful that our mutual friend introduced us forty years ago today. I was closed off and didn’t expect to fall in love again. I was searching for a life of my own, not one to share. I wasn’t ready. But then some of the best moments in life are surprises. You just never know when that one person will fill your heart and make you feel like you are home.